Friday, June 21, 2013

Some People Are Just Assholes

Wow... Some people, I swear. I fight for Autism Education, and light into someone who thinks that the diagnosis of Autism is "Bullshit", and I get reamed because I attempt to point out that perhaps said person should ask the parents who have to fight with insurance companies, school officials, have to leave a grocery store or a restaurant because of a meltdown, whether or not Autism is an actual disorder or not. Now apparently I'm a bigoted asshole, because I dare to say someone has a lack of empathy for these parents to someone who until just now has never made mention of his Autistic status? BS. Autistic or not, you're still acting like a spoiled brat with mommy issues. Believe me, I understand the difficulties. And if these recent news reports about parents and caregivers killing their Autistic children are upsetting to you, you're not the only one. I'm upset by them too. HOWEVER... They are not the norm. And to lump us all as "Monster parents who forget that Autism isn't about them." is a pretty serious accusation. If you have issues with how your parents treated you, take it up with them. But to say, "Ooh, poor parents, Fuck them... it's not about them." only shows just how angsty you really are. You come off as a 15 year old. Certainly not the autistic parent of three non-autistics who was raised by an aunt with neuro issues of her own and an autistic cousin... ::brain implodes a bit:: I wonder ( /endsarcasm) where all of that anger comes from? IF your story is true, and I say IF, then perhaps you have deeper issues than just autism. 

The facts remain the same. Autism isn't JUST about one person. It affects the ENTIRE family... especially when that family is a close family unit. These parents who do anything and everything they can to make the world a little bit less stressful for their children DO DESERVE to have some empathy. Hell, I'll say it.. We deserve a little sympathy too. And every so often, we deserve to have someone pick up the pieces for the night and say, "You deserve some time to yourself." If that makes me a selfish, horrible, monster of a parent, then so be it. I guess I'm a selfish, horrible monster of a parent, because I spend 23/7 thinking about my son, who has autism, and the effects his autism will have on him, and his neurotypical brother throughout their lives. I spend that 23/7 trying to advocate for better services, better insurance coverage, less political crap in our medical issues, attempting to educated the public about autistic behaviors that they may not understand, to help make the world more autism friendly so that other parents, like myself and my husband can feel confident taking their children out to a restaurant or a movie theater without fear of some ignorant jackass making a scene, or throwing us out because Malcolm decides to stim during desert, or through the opening credits. That one hour that I left out... I spend trying to squeeze in a shower, eat something that isn't part of Malcolm's typical 'yellow diet' routine, or I don't know, have a conversation with my husband that isn't autism/child related. 

So go ahead. Judge me, if it makes you feel better about your lack of whatever it is that has you so freakin' angry. I will tell you the same thing I tell my son though. Autism or not.... you do not get a free pass to be an asshole.

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